The Pumpkin Man Illuminates

It was just before bedtime. I was carrying the Pumpkin Man, his head on my chest,  and we were heading into the book room to do our reading and I said something that ended with, "my son. Maybe it was, "do two Hail Marys and three Our Fathers." Probably not though. 

He said back, "You're my son."

I said, "No. You're my son."

He said, "You're my son."

I said "No. I'm you're daddy, you're my son."

He said, "No. You're my son."

I said, "Do you mean son like son and daddy or sun like the sun that shines outside."

He leaned back and looked at me and said, "The sun goes up. The sun goes down. You're my sun."

I can't even express in words how much that makes me the winner. Big winner. Right Here. 

HM

Dribs and drabs?

What's a good cutesy title for a post where you just have a couple quick things to say and you want to get them out of the way? Leftovers? Loose strings? Bits'npieces! I think that is the one that would make someone want to kick me in my bb's.
Bongos? Bingos!

Bingo-bongos?

First, I felt weird about my last post. So this is an apology.

My wife said: "Rape jokes aren't funny."

I said: "You're smiling. And besides, it's more of a not worthy of you so I have to blah blah blah annoying senseless noises coming from my mouth. And rape jokes are too funny. And you're smiling."

She said: "I'm your wife (implication: "you butt munch.").

So, that might be an ok point. So I apologize if I offended.

Secondly, my 2 year old girl has started conversing about her vagina lately. Often, I'm fine with it.

This exchange however, I actually found delightful.

Peanut: (her name) has a 'gina."

Me: yes you do sweetie.

Peanut: "Daddy and Baby pumpkin man have a penis."

Me: That's right, very good.

Peanut: (her name) has a 'gina and mommy have a gina. Mommy have a big BIG 'gina.


I'm sure this is purely a matter of perspective.


gigglingly,

Homemaker Man

Oh Blog, I'm Sorry, I Can't Deal. School is Here

So, I haven't posted in a while. The formatting problem with my blog is one reason. All my stuff, links, info and so forth, is down at the bottom of the page. I can't muster the time or attention span to sit down and attend to it properly. That stuff sort of intimidates me. Nuts and bolts computer stuff. I am bullied by html. One time I was wedgied by code. A downloading error once took my lunch money. etc.

The other reason is that I am a stay at home dad, and my wife went back to work today after summer vacation. This is like tax season for accountants or Halloween for delinquents. Busy, busy, busy. Gotta get a lot of the big projects that went unattended to (read:ignored) over the summer finished. Front yard, back yard. Laundry. Not all the laundry of course. I kept bathing suits and shorts clean all summer. Mostly. Thank You.

And I have to leave time to stress about the fact that the Pumpkin Man for some reason decided to quit taking his bottle a day, deciding that yelling at us until his mother basically left her breast out forever was the better choice. I'm torn I admit. And The Peanut is now old enough to really notice that her mom is gone all day and ask for her or for her whereabouts. Usually she knows where we are at all times. In her head if she doesn't see one of us then that means that "mommy's sleepin'" or "daddy's poopin'. Yep, I'm regular and she's exhausted.

Back from Vacation

Hey Blog.  Got back from vacation late wednesday night.  We were at the above.  

Sebago Lake in Maine. 

Pretty sweet.  My 8 month old boy, the Pumpkin Man, really enjoyed his time in the lake.  Or he hated it.  I'm not entirely sure.  He's 8 months.   What he demonstratively enjoyed was being doted on by the three women (my wife's aunt and 2 cousins) we stayed with.  Chicks dig the Pumpkin Man (his nick name is the Pumpkin Man only because he is round, fat, and orange and at night we scoop out his insides and jam a candle in his face so as to backlight his menacing grin.  Zing.).  Out of the week were on vacation, he must've spent about 16 total waking minutes not in someone's arms.  

And we're talking the arms of a 49 year-old women who never had a boy, a 22 year old kindergarten teacher, and an 18 year-old with a yen for all things cuddly.  Kid had a harem.  

Vacation was amazing.  We were out of the city for a heat wave, the lake was incredible, and my wife and I constantly found ourselves without children.   Instead of immediately running away, which was obviously the wisest course of action, we just kept sitting there and going, "we don't have any children.  Our children are not with us.  You don't have a baby.  I don't have a baby.  Hey honey, where are the kids?  I don't know!"

Very relaxing and wonderful.  The above mentioned women are generous and loving and fun and great and I feel lucky to be a part of their family.  

Getting home was not so amazing.  We came back having to still deal with Kevin and Fat Tony, do some serious yard work (the yard looks like a Vietnamese jungle), an ant invasion, and de-spoiling both babies.   S'good to be home.